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鈥淎nd he has already had naked man antics.鈥�

That really does need explaining to spare Max any unnecessary blushes. It wasn鈥檛 him who was naked, you see. He just took a photograph of someone who was. 鈥淪tephen and I got home last night and we were sitting on the balcony and suddenly this fat naked guy appeared on the street below,鈥� he explains. 鈥淲as he actually completely naked?鈥� asks Julia. 鈥淏utt naked,鈥� confirms Max.

鈥淪o I got the camera out and shouted 鈥極i! Fat naked guy!鈥� and took a picture. The flash went off and he had a total sense of humour failure, broke through the ground floor door of the apartment, ran up to our room and started banging on the door. Obviously we hid behind the sofa.鈥�

Through peals of laughter, Chris explains that he actually had to manoeuvre past the man on his way back to the apartment later. 鈥淗e had calmed down by then, thank God,鈥� he says. 鈥淏ut there was definitely something suspect about him.鈥� 鈥淪uspect?鈥� asks Julia. 鈥淥ther than the fact he was naked?鈥�

The group concurs that this is, without doubt, the craziest thing that has happened all week but it hasn鈥檛 been the only drama. Chris had his wallet stolen and has had to spend most of the day in a police station. 鈥淚 waited for hours only to be told, 鈥楢h monsieur. Demain.鈥� So I have to bloody well go back again.鈥� Everyone is still laughing about the naked man, so sympathy is in short supply.

On to a more serious topic then. Dead pets. 鈥淲hen the kids were small we had three little guinea pigs,鈥� recalls Chris. 鈥淲e also had a terrier. I got a call from my wife Jane saying, 鈥榃e have a bit of a problem with the guinea pigs.鈥� The dog had killed all three and buried one. Obviously we hid that part from the kids. We said guinea pigs just go underground sometimes.鈥�

鈥淚 know a girl who went to meet her boyfriend鈥檚 parents for the first time and sat on the dog,鈥� adds Stephen. 鈥淎nd killed it. That鈥檚 a bad first meeting. They got married though.鈥�

The talk of deceased pets is getting a bit too much for Julia who is now wide-eyed, her hands clapped over her mouth, so we move on to something more topical 鈥� the recent story about a London architectural practice offering staff 拢6 an hour to work a 14-hour day: 鈥淚t鈥檚 bizarre because a practice should be able to command the right level of fees to support its intake,鈥� says Jeb. 鈥淚t is certainly something to be very concerned about鈥� adds Chris. 鈥淎rchitects are very able people and they need to be properly rewarded.鈥�

The conversation continues but soon the iPhones are out and Jeb 鈥� for no apparent reason 鈥� is passing round a photo of a sheep. 鈥淲e started with naked men and now we鈥檝e moved onto animals,鈥� laughs Chris before realising his fatal error. 鈥淭hat sounds bad. That鈥檚 going to be the headline isn鈥檛 it?鈥�